Roleplay for Couples: Less Acting, More Flirting

Fancy being chatted up by a sexy stranger, but quite attached to the one you've already got? Handy. You can have the flirtation without downloading an app or finding out someone else's bathroom habits.

A different outfit, a bolder attitude or pretending you've just met gives familiar sex a fresh excuse to get cheeky. Pick an adult fantasy you're both into and borrow the bit that turns you on. You don't need to invent a whole person. You're already shagging a perfectly good one.

Get chatted up by your own partner

Remember making an effort to impress each other? Before “fancy an early night?” became a question about actual sleep?

Pretending you're strangers brings a little of that attention back. Let your partner catch your eye, ask to sit beside you or give you a compliment that has absolutely nothing to do with how efficiently you loaded the dishwasher.

Try it at home or behind a hotel-room door. You can arrive separately, dress for a date and enjoy being looked at as someone worth making a move on. No one needs a fake passport or an imaginary job in finance.

Keep the flirting simple. Ask what caught their eye. Tell them what caught yours. Hold their gaze for a little longer than usual. Knowing exactly who you're flirting with doesn't stop it feeling good to be pursued.

Dress for the fantasy you actually fancy

If the outfit is what gets you going, give it the attention. A costume changes the look straight away, while lingerie lets you play the much simpler role of yourself looking bloody tempting.

The Baci First Class Fantasy set is for nights when your usual undies aren't quite selling the fantasy. Put it on, enjoy the look you're getting and leave the complicated backstory in the drawer.

You don't need to talk differently just because you're dressed differently. If you fancy the uniform but not the dialogue, let the clothes be the naughty bit. A slow reveal beats ten minutes spent explaining why your character has arrived.

And choose something you enjoy wearing. Our guide to choosing lingerie helps with that. The sexy surprise loses a bit of its charm if you're quietly wishing someone would rescue you from your own outfit.

Take a turn being the bossy one

Perhaps you don't want a costume. You want your usually easygoing partner to stop asking what you fancy and make a cheeky suggestion of their own.

Being more forward, asking for attention or enjoying someone else doing the pursuing gives you a different way to flirt. You can swap who's leading without turning either of you into a completely different person.

If either of you says stop, the roleplay stops. Otherwise, have some fun with being a bit bolder. Tell them they look good. Tell them you want their attention. Being wanted is sexy; being wanted out loud has its own appeal.

Our dirty-talk guide has more ideas if the words are what you fancy. Use your own voice, though. Your partner wants to hear you sound turned on, not find out you've been practising a gravelly accent in the car.

You can laugh and still get turned on

A line will come out wrong. Someone will forget the pretend name. You might get halfway through a grand entrance and discover the costume has caught on the door handle.

Laugh. Kiss. Carry on if you're enjoying it. Getting the giggles doesn't mean you've failed at being sexy, and dropping the character doesn't mean the night has to end.

If you like a little nudge without inventing the scene yourself, a couples sex game gives you ideas to play with. Or ditch the props and keep the extra flirting. Even a very short stint as mysterious strangers is worth it if you end up fancying each other a bit harder.