Coital Alignment: The Missionary Tweak That Grinds Right on Your Clit

Your clit's right there. Yet penetration can carry on as though nobody told it where the party was. Then one night, your partner shifts up a few centimetres, presses their whole body against you and stops thrusting so much. Instead they start to rock, and suddenly every movement grinds right where you want it. Oh. Hello.

That's the coital alignment technique, or CAT for short. It changes your position and movement so there's more contact around your clit during penetration. It's basically missionary with a much better sense of direction.

Start with missionary, then shift up

You lie on your back with your partner on top, facing you. They then slide up your body a little, so the base of their cock or strap-on presses against your clit, with their weight mostly over you. The exact spot depends on your bodies, so make small changes together. They should keep their weight supported, not drop it all on you. Our missionary guide covers the basics.

Rock, don't thrust

This is the bit that takes some getting used to. Forget long strokes. You move together in a slow rhythm: you press up while they press down, then you switch. It's far more of a grind than a pound, and you stay in constant contact. That means you're getting steady pressure right where you need it, and steady pressure's what gets a lot of people there.

Keep your feedback simple. "A little higher", "less pressure" and "fuck, stay there" all work. Use plenty of lube, and stop for pain. More friction isn't automatically more pleasure.

Use a hand or vibrator if you want to

Want to give the grind some extra help? A vibrating cock ring like the Fun Factory Speed Date sits exactly where all that pressure's landing. If the adjustment just feels awkward, a hand or a bullet vibrator can do the job in another position. That isn't cheating. Neither is going back to what you already know feels bloody good.

Judge the feeling, not the finish

CAT has been studied, but no named technique guarantees an orgasm for every body. You may love the closeness, even if you don't come from it. Skip the "Are you close yet?" commentary, as a new position doesn't need a progress report every thirty seconds.

If you can come easily alone but struggle with a partner, our solo vs partner orgasm guide looks at why. And our guide to orgasm and penetration explains why your clit deserves a say in the first place.