Queefing During Sex: Your Vagina Made a Noise. So What?

You're having a great time. You're on your knees with someone's hands on your hips. You change position, and your vagina makes a noise that neither of you ordered. For a second, everyone forgets what they were doing.

That's a queef: air that got into the vagina on its way back out. It can sound just like a fart, but it isn't one. It's not gas from your bowel, and it usually has no smell. It's very common during sex, and it's almost always harmless. You don't owe the bedroom an apology.

Why good sex pushes air in

A cock, fingers or a toy moving in and out can let air in with each stroke. The harder and longer you're going, the more chance of that. Then you change position, your body shifts, and out it comes. Doggy, legs-up and anything with your hips in the air are the usual suspects. Exercise and other movement can do it too.

The sound isn't a measure of how much sex you've had, how sexy you are or how the night's going. If anything, it means somebody's been getting thoroughly and enthusiastically fucked.

It's definitely not a reason for anyone to announce that you're "too loose". That's not how vaginas work, and what a deeply unsexy thing to say to someone who's letting you in.

You can laugh or keep on fucking

If you both think it's funny, have a laugh. Some of the best sex happens right after somebody's cracked up. You don't have to keep a serious face just because your clothes are off.

If you're embarrassed, you don't have to join in a joke about your own body. A good partner can be kind about it, keep it small, and let you decide whether to carry on. The best response from the person behind you is usually to pull you back in by the hips and keep going, as if the only thing they've noticed is how much they want you.

There's a difference between sharing a laugh and turning someone into the evening's entertainment. The group chat doesn't need a report.

Changing position is an option, not a duty

You might notice that one particular move brings it on. You can change that if it makes you more comfortable, but you don't have to give up a position you love just to keep the room silent. If you really love doggy, keep the doggy.

Our guide to asking for changes during sex keeps it simple. "Let's try this instead" does the job, without a lengthy explanation.

Don't ever blow or force air into the vagina. And don't buy tightening products because a noise made you self-conscious. A queef isn't a shopping list.

If you want air involved on purpose

Since we're on the subject, there's a much better way of getting air into your sex life, and it stays on the outside. Air pulse toys sit over your clit and work it with waves of pressure, no thrusting required. The Satisfyer Penguin does this while dressed in a small tuxedo, and it's hard to feel self-conscious about anything once you've come your brains out on a penguin.

When vaginal gas needs a doctor

See a doctor if it happens often outside of sex, or comes with pain, an unusual smell, unusual discharge or stool leaking from the vagina. Those symptoms deserve a proper assessment, rather than an online diagnosis.

If you've got wider pelvic-floor concerns, ask for an individual assessment. Our kegel ball guide explains why heavier weights aren't the answer for everybody.

For an occasional noise while you're rolling around in bed, you don't need a solution. You were naked, you were enjoying yourself, and someone was very happy to be there. Get back to that.